We have all noticed a seemingly huge increase in the player injuries Arsenal have suffered in recent seasons.
A recent study showed that other clubs were also badly affected last year, but I suspect if statistics are available on similar injuries they would show that we have been hit harder than any club over the last few years. Why?
It would be easy to answer that our skilful guys get clobbered by the Neanderthal types employed by Stoke, for example, and Bolton and Blackburn in recent years, and undoubtedly this does play a part, but there must be more to it than just that.
We need to have a look at some physics to allow us to get some perspective here. Nothing too tricky you understand, but enough to show that we cannot simply blame the Orcs for culling our pride and joy, or our medical team for being negligent or incompetent.
If we take a look at a seemingly unrelated every day event, we are all aware that car crashes occur every minute of any given day, and can do serious and sometimes fatal damage to their occupants, at what were seemingly very modest speeds.
It is common for a car travelling at 25mph, well within the speed limit, to be involved in a collision which can kill the driver, who appeared to be driving slowly and carefully. How come, you may ask?
The answer, at least in part, is that there might well be another party involved, who, for the sake of this discussion, might also be classified as a careful and slow driver, who was also travelling at a measly 25mph.
The fact is that in relation to each other they were not travelling at a sedate 25mph at all, but at the combined speed of the two vehicles, which would be the equivalent of driving into a brick wall at 50mph – not to be recommended.
So how does that help us understand what is happening to our footballers?
Let’s take Usain Bolt, that fantastic sprinter, as a base point, and see what we can learn from him. It is accepted that he runs the 100 metres at approximately 23mph. Wow, not too far away from the speed of the cars in the example above.
Now, OK. Let’s accept that he is unique, and not many footballers can run at that pace, but many of them, like Theo Walcott, can very probably attain a speed of approximately 20mph, and some of the lesser lights in the EPL could routinely hit speeds of 18mph.
It is therefore obvious that if Theo was running at 20mph and was tripped, or if he was run into by a crazed goal keeper in an International game, he would experience extraordinary deceleration forces akin to a ‘minor’ car crash, on the specific part of his body which was affected, such, as in the recent event, the bruising to his ribs and lungs.
That’s all very well, I can almost hear you say, but how might that theory explain an injury to a goal keeper who is unlikely to sustain the sort of speeds Theo and others are capable of achieving?
Well the theory of relativity, which you will be pleased to learn I will not go into here, introduces an element of mass, or weight, for want of a better understood term, as well as energy and speed into the equation.
So, imagine a thumping great 15 stone (mass) centre half running at Zsczesney in the penalty area, at a stately speed of 14mph, while at the same time 12 stone Chezzer is coming out to collect the ball at a leisurely 10mph.
Any resultant collision would occur at an approximate speed of 24mph, but with a greater combined weight (mass) than two slim forwards or midfielders would generate.
It is possible therefore that if the goal keeper landed on his arm or more likely his ankle, this would generate a force comparable to smashing it into a wall at 24mph with great energy.
Suddenly we can see that lumbering Orc types or allegedly negligent physiotherapists are only a part of the problem, and the law of physics is also playing its part in the process.
Diaby, Eduardo, Rambo have all fallen foul of stupid, thuggish tackles that have or might in the future seriously blight their careers, but the impact of players limbs coming into contact with each other at relatively modest speeds is inevitably also subject to nature’s laws.
I suspect few referees or those in authority have given any real thought or have any proper appreciation of this immutable fact, otherwise they would be much harsher in stamping out the thuggish Neanderthal challenges (fouls) and also the intrinsically worse actions of the game’s sly villains who care nothing for the endangerment of their fellow professionals or their careers.
Red Arse.
To all readers:
Although some bloggers might appear very familiar and informal with each others, please never hesitate to comment if you feel like it. Bergkampesque welcomes any contributions as long as they are made in a sensible and respectful way.
Have a go and make a comment, and you will find you’ll get a warm welcome, and it makes blogging a lot more fun! 🙂
Bergkampesque 
That Red Arse talks a lot of scientific hooey! 🙂
Hi Redders,
Thanks for a fantastic post. 🙂
The analogy with car accidents makes total sense and it is obvious that the most important thing is to avoid nasty collisions as much as possible when you are a footballer.
The laws of physics seemed to have been extra unkind to Arsenal for the last so many years.
I wonder whether the relative youthfulness of our recent squads – which is luckily changing rapidly now – combined with Arsene often seeming to overuse our players too much, has also been a big factor in our high number of long-term injured players.
Are bones strong enough when players are not fully grown adults yet, or even when they are in their early twenties? Maybe Oz can help us here.
And are our (often) younger players not pitch-wise enough, as in able to spot the imminent danger of a bad tackle and choosing better when to go into a tackle and when not?
Everyone is having a long lunch it seems, Redders! Silence before the storm 😛
Just to let you know:
I have taken out the sections ‘blogging community’ and ‘quote of the week’, as with the new WordPress theme for the the blog, it clogged the right hand side up and did not allow me to show the whole blogging community but only the last ten bloggers, which I don’t like.
I am also going to trim down the so called tag-cloud on the right hand side.
Redders, brilliant post.
You hit on some realy pertinent points. The speed of the game has increased and players are more musculer than there predecsors. If you combine the fact that we had a youthful and not yet fully developed team anotimcly then that goes some way to explaining some of the serious injuries.
This surley then has a psycoligical effect too. Players, wether it be concisoluy or sub concisouly are aware when the oppenents have a greater body mass index. This results in them jumping out of tackles and been a bit of a chicken. I should know because when i saw a big oppenent in Sunday league, just before kick off i would make out i needed a change of boots and had to go to the changing rooms….and never came back. hahaha
TA,
Sorry I have not been around for a while — unexpected problem, but now sorted.
(trying to get a plumber at short notice is a bit of a bugger). 🙂
Hi Terry, 🙂
Thank you and TA for being so kind about my inadequate Post! 🙂
You really are a little genius on the quiet — I never thought about the ‘changing my boots’ routine, and if only I had been smart enough to use it I would not have been flattened so many times in my brief interlude playing American football.
The guys a lot shorter than me were built like brick shithouses and took me out at waist height! Ouch.
The guys as tall as me were —- built like brick shithouses and took me out around the neck! Ouch.
After breaking my arm and going back — -and breaking it again ……….. I gave up!! 🙂
Terry,
Can I just say that I read your Post on AA and have commented there, but you are always good for laugh and with the Glicster you are one of the comedy twins.
That said, I think your Post has revealed you in a new light as someone able to follow a comedic theme for the whole length of an involved essay.
You are undoubtedly barmy, as well as funny, and I am hoping to see more of your work, both on AA but also on here! 🙂
Ouch indeed Redders. I dislocated my kneecap whilst playing football when I was 36 and that was it for me. Too risky to continue as my boss did not want me to be off-sick again. However, yours sounds bad too though! 😦
Thanks again for a fine, quality post. It has been a bit quiet but that’s because it’s Friday – the second one in the inter-lull and therefore bound to be like this.
Totally agree on your description of the Telescope man! 🙂
What a fine post, never thought of it in the ” car crash” way, but so true. If you also take in the consideration of speed of a Shawcross leg kicking out, this makes the impact even more powerfull. Weight = power, speed and weight combined = OUCH !.
The way to beat these Laws of Physic`s ?, simple, Stretch hit on the idea earlier, it is known technically as, the Laws of Psychic`s ( also known as the Laws of Glic, `coz I invented it ! hahaha ) !.
Yes , I know, they sound similar ( I know your thinking that `coz I`m Psychic ). There is a broadband ( no, not Sky and BT, but if they could they would !, I know this , I`m being Psychic again ! hahaha ) of the word Psychic, in this instance I shall relate it to ,” Precoqnition”, the ability to see the future !. So to put it simply, when you see a big f**ker running at you, get out the f**king way or as Stretch put it, ” stay in the changing room !. hahaha
Good eves me peeps
I was a peeping on de webs when I is a coming on this site, not only is it aving de names of my fav player, I is finders my cus Terry Flopalopadous !. Yes cus, it`s me innit, Mrs Flopalopadous`s fav, Stiffy !.
I is anot seeing yous since we went on a date with thems West `ammers crumpits, yous must remembers them, they liking to ” blowing bubbles !. (hehehe)
Remembers the time, you is damagers your telescope and you is a writing to the bloody beebs asking if Jim`ll fix for yous !, blimey your `scope was never the sames after that !
Does yous still likes going up de Arse ?. I is going to the Queens hooray henrys game, yous can meet me at my burger bar in Blackstock roads, I names it after my favers player, it`s called ,” Demis Burgerkamp ” !.
Laters Floppy
PS , dont bring cus Pete, ees a bloody alien innit !.
Hello Stiffy
Were the bloody hells you been. Mrs Floppy is keep asking about you. The other day after i flop again she says to me ” Oi Terry, were the bloody hell is Stiffy”? I say “How the hell do i know Trouble and Strifes, i havent seen him for bloody years init, you silly moosses” She get very angry Stiffy, and now i have big bloody bruises on cocks.
That bloody Jimmy Savvile. He is fix it for me alright. When he sees me he says “Oi Terry, i will fix telescope and if you grasses Jimmy, i will fix it you never have Telescope again” I say bloody Nora Jimmy, you is bloody pedoman, you old Bastards. He only starts flipping chasing me and starts singing that shits song “Jim will fix Telescope for you, and you, and you”
Will see you at the Queens Arse game init, Dont eat any Denis Burgerkamp before i bloody gets there.
New Post! 🙂